What Kept Me From Banging My Head Against the Wall (and Calling it Quits!)

Posted: December 13, 2010 in Writing
Tags: ,

If you’ve read my world building post from last week, you can get a glimpse of the writing frustrations I’ve been experiencing lately.  Because I did my worldbuilding half ass before writing my novel, I’m paying the consequences by having to go back and start from square one.  It’s been three weeks now and though I’ve been working quite diligently, I’m not even close to where I need to be.  Just when I think I’m done with one aspect, another funky one shows itself and I’m like “Aaaah!”  With every new tree I make up, another scene in my book will face the editing ax. I mean, I knew this was going to be work but geez!  It seems like my whole novel might have to be redone – one that took me two years to write in the first place!

Please point me to the nearest wall so I can bang my head into it.

Last night I found myself getting a little depressed about it. The more I seem to work, the larger my manuscript hole is getting and for the first time in a very long time I found myself asking, “Is all of this really worth it?  Did I get in over my head?  Will I ever get done with this thing? Am I even good enough to do this?”  The doubt monster was working crazy overtime last night and my funk was only getting worse.

Please, please show me that wall….wait a minute…

I had to stop myself from engaging in my head banging (followed by a pity party and the temper tantrum of “I’m done with this piece of ****).  I had to do that one thing that has kept me going this far with my book.  This particular “thing” has me attending my 4-hour long writing meetings, reading my favorite writing blogs every day, researching until my eyes bleed, and writing that damn first chapter over and over.

I have to start dreaming again.

Dreaming of HBO, Showtime, or heck, Universal Pictures knocking on my door wanting to option my book for a movie or cable TV series.

Dreaming of people going to MegaCon, ComicCon, and all the other Cons dressed up as my characters.

Dreaming of being on panel discussions on fantasy literature at major writing conventions

Okay, I’ll be a tad more realistic!

Dreaming of seeing my book on the book shelf along side other notable fantasy authors.

Dreaming of showing my future children that their mom set out to do what she always wanted to do.

Dreaming of where I want to be damn sure helps me get through all the frustrations, doubts, and fears that come with the writer’s territory.  And that my friends, is what kept me from banging my head into oblivion and keep it moving.

What has kept you pushing through you tough writing moments?

Photo courtesy of:   domesticdivinity.blogspot.com

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by VisualAdjectives and M. McGriff, M. McGriff. M. McGriff said: What Can Kept Me From Banging My Head Against the Wall (and Calling it Quits!): http://wp.me/p164Vv-34 […]

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